Thursday, December 23, 2010

It Was Not a Silent Night......

During this Christmas season, I could listen to this one song...OVER AND OVER

This song is just so beautiful. 
Our Savior
Born

Today I found myself in tears....
We received the next "packet" this week from AGCI.

In it was our Adoption Planner and a disk.....
more forms

We had our webinar Wednesday at lunch with our Case Worker at AGCI. I meticulously took notes over an already highlighted planner from previous study.

I took off work today. I organized papers and forms.
I made many calls.

I had our afternoon perfectly planned.

Tim left his office and I headed from home down again to the Sheriff's office only for it to be closed, EVEN THOUGH I spoke to someone who said they would be open till 3pm. All doors closed.

So no worries...we'd just go get the remaining documents notarized. Only to realize once getting to our bank I had made mistakes.

Defeated. Discouraged. Teary-eyed.

I worked so hard to really use this day to get much more done and to be one little step closer to bringing our baby home.

And what really happened was we both drove all around town only to not accomplish anything at all.

After getting in the car to go home from the bank...tears welled up. 

 I listen to z88.3 and they're playing Christmas music now.

What song came on?

Labor of Love.

It dawned on me, this is our labor of love for our baby.

The volumes of paper work.
The perfection required so paper work is approved.
The journey to get on the waiting family list.
The journey to wait for our referral.
The journey to the other side of our world....

Moses' mother...it was not a silent night when she gave birth to him either. 
The tears down her face and pain she felt when he was placed in the Nile river.
The Labor of Love she felt when saving her son from death.
She loved him so much.
I can't imagine.

So I've had a good hard cry. Tim has been supportive as always.

Wish the paper work could be done. 

It will be.

It just feels like staring at Everest.

Soon we will be checking a lot of things off our list and the videos I love will also be our story.

Little Mary Full of Grace. With the tears down her beautiful face.

It was not a Silent night in David's town.

It was a Labor of Love.



1 comment:

kera said...

I said this to you on the phone one afternoon.....just as a pregnant lady goes through the labor process....it's long and hard and you hit bumps along with way....you too are going through all the same long and hard pain with bumps along with you! You are positive in spirit by nature and I just know that you are pushing forward!! Tim is an awesome support! Love you momma!! You will be holding your baby before you know and I just might be stealing some kisses from he/she too!!